*sigh* can I never just stick with something and do it right? Or at least finish it. Gosh I'm a failure at everything. 17 days of no purging. Down the drain, it means nothing. Why did I even bother trying. If I would have known it could be taken away so easily as not eating a piece of meat and a fruit and drinking a glass of milk, I wouldn't have tried so hard. I guess the 6 starches 4 fats 2 dairy 2 vegitables and 1 fruit that I did eat wasn't enough. I guess eating like a pig = restricting. MAKES NO FUCKING SENSE. So anyway. I'm no longer sober and I'm no longer trying. Cutting is now part of my sobriety so even if I was sober before I'm not anymore. I hate these new rules. I'm not going to work with someone who tells me all my hard work was for nothing and it's sad because I really like her, as a person, as a sponsor even. But she took my sobriety away from me and so I refuse to accept that. And I know I will never find anyone 1/2 as good as she was. So I'm quitting. I'm dropping out of ABA. Sayonara suckers.
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